Monday, September 29, 2008

30-day Chip

Do you get a little chip for surviving time living with teenagers? If so, Gabi & I just earned our 30-day chip!!! My little Gabi-roo turned 13 one month ago and we have had super-high highs and some super-low lows. I have to admit that her turning 13 is a struggle for me. I still want her to be a little girl who I can hold onto and keep safe and innocent. I still want her to want to sleep in my bed (believe it or not!) and choose going to the movies, or the even just to the store with me, instead of playing Rock Band with her friends. (Although it is hard for anyone to compete with the awesome force that is Rock Band.) But she is a little seedling struggling toward the sun of independence, and I need to nurture that as much as it may challenge me.

She is really developing a cute sense of style and I recognize myself in her unique fashion sense, artistic sensibilities, and her fierce determination to be an individual. That recognition is both exciting and terrifying. I know that my tendency to melodrama, overwhelming impulse to imagine worst-case scenarios, and desire to control everything are not helpful things to inherit. But I know she can withstand this stormy time and that we will make it through to the other side in tact, even if we come out a little scratched and bruised and clinging to each other for dear life. While it may all seem intense right now, I know it's just life, and that the good truly outweighs the not-so-good. So, as I accept my 30-day chip, I end by saying, "My name is Rebecca, and I am the mother of two teenagers."

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